Did my title get you?…Good, because if I spend time writing something, your ass better read it!!!
I’m sitting here with a bonnet on my head, a big ass sweatshirt because I don’t feel like putting on a bra and I sipped on a little bit of a glass of left over wine from the night before (and my place is a mess)…how ’bout maintenance just knocked on my door talking ’bout “we need to replace your tub NOW”. They must think I’m a drunk bumb…oh well..so is life…
Well, I’m off today – have couple of job interviews (I’m praying, knocking on wood, and searching for a four leaf clover) But enough about my personal life! Let’s get into this title!!!!!
So I was watching News Now with Roland Martin this morning and the title of a book some chick wrote (something like) “Black women should leave the church, why the church is failing black women” came on and caught my interest. I usually don’t watch this show but for whatever reason, the good lord saw fit to play this on my big screen tv.
How ’bout (I know I say this a lot) this chick is an idiot – she couldn’t back up anything that she said. It was all opinion based. I didn’t agree with jack shit that she said!!
Funny story. I live in Philly, where we have an excellent transportation system. I JUST got my licence in July (I’m 29). My parent’s bought me a brand new car for Christmas with the stipulation that I go to church to fellowship since my excuse for my absence in church was that it was “too far”.
…My mom keeps saying “go to church, that’s where you’ll find your husband”. I’m just like, “yeah mom, you say this every time I talk to you.” Fast forward, I’m in a hair salon and they’re talking about church. I’m like “well don’t put too much stock in those people, they aren’t any better than anyone else, cuz honey the same saints singing the gospel on Sunday are the same ones sinning on Saturday!!!”
Lawd, the thing I can’t stand is a mofo, especially a black person, that thinks that they are better than someone else! Especially because I choose to live my life differently than you OR because GOD has ordered my steps differently than YOURS. (Being 29 and single is not exactly a picnic)
So imagine my annoyance when some broad comes on tv and tells me that I am wrong for going to church, praying, and believing in God because it didn’t work for her! (I wanted to yell at the tv, “Bitch you’re alive and breathing so PRAISE HIM) …but these hoes ain’t loyal…(excuse my language lord)
Well, this broad said her piece (with no facts – I believe this was a personal attack on the particular church that she was with) Basically, she said “well the bible say we should, yada yada spend a lot of time at church – but who has time to exercise if we follow the bible strictly? – because of this black women have Diabetes and Heart disease, etc…” “the church has failed us because they haven’t stressed education”…”the church has failed us because they haven’t taught us the importance of our health…” …”now I’m an atheist because MY church wouldn’t let me initiate these initiatives…” Huh?
What does it say about YOU, that you give up YOUR GOD because a couple of people in a room somewhere in bumbelfuck NOWHERE doesn’t want to listen to your opinion? I, myself, have TRIED to lose my religion a couple of times because things weren’t working out. Seemed like everyone I knew was in a relationship, getting married, and starting a family…Me, I’m just here. Sitting on the couch, half drunk from the night before, with my bonnet on and no bra, with loud ass maintenance men, tearing up my bathroom, tryna have FAITH. Faith that my day will improve, and that the lord will bless me because I believe he will. Patience is truly a virtue and have FAITH is taking a step without seeing the staircase.
I felt compelled to write about this segment today, because I feel like a lot of my single folk are losing FAITH! I mentioned earlier my discussion at the salon regarding the church. Well, while at the salon, I also got into a very heated discussion regarding personal accountability…it’s easy to DEFLECT and distract yourself into thinking that someone else is to blame for your problems. YOU ARE. Before you give up your religion and start SETTLING (a big no-no in dating) see if there’s something that you can improve. For example, the author of that book should’ve have joined another church or started her own!
As the (unfortunate) eternal optimist, I’d like to think that everything happens for a reason. When I’m faced with defeat, I like to look at it as a triumph; because I learned something. There was a lesson that God wanted/needed me to learn so that I can move forward and be the best possible person that I can be. The true tragedy is not learning anything.
Sorry for the long post but this topic just sparked something in me!! While the church doesn’t have ALL of the answers, neither do we! I like to think, I live my life with the reminder that God is always in my footsteps, regardless of my missteps…So my mom thinking that my future mate is at my church may be incorrect, but he will certainly be someone that God has placed within my steps.
Anywho…sorry for getting religious all on your Thursday, especially since I know you’ll be sinning all Friday and Saturday (as will I – the weekends are my Olympics as far as bad behavior is concerned)
I’ve said all this to say – Keep the faith!! My main man got ya’ back!!!!
Till next time!!!
Take a shot for me…:-)